I think that is the most important thing to do when we are listening to someone.
It is also the easiest to mess it up.
I got the line of an email from a friend "(s)
omeone who not only listens to your difficulties and woes, but assures u of God's promises and always point you, not to himself, but always to the feet of God"
The words struck me as being very real and true. It is important that we as friends must listen, but more importantly, listen and bring people back to God. But the line to tread, between loving someone enough to bring the person back to God, and becoming preachy is so so fine.
A few weeks ago, i was fighting a old demon within me, loneliness. And a friend came out. And friends came out, and started to try to bring me back to God.
This is my challenge to everyone. Do you listen before you bring people back to God? Do you know where the person stands before you bring the person back to God? How can you who do not listen know where to go? Listening is not a skill only, it is a gift. A gift you give to your friends.
I think it is time to realise the two fold part of listening. One requires us to really listen and more than just listen, understand the person's pain. The other is the call to them to come home to God.
Either way, it is pride that brings us to do one without the other.
Advice without listening is a pride; we think we know the person's situation.
Listening without advice, is a pride; we think we can do it without God.
Anyway on a more jovial note. I learnt something precious this
CNY.
People do not like rules. Or rather, we love rules for OTHERS, but when we are given rules, we do our utmost to stretch, bend, distort etc.
Christianity is not about rules. It is about relationship with God. It is about the quest to love God more. Rules serve as a tutor to love; they teach you what love is. But they are not love.
Traditions passed down without the grounding of love is but a set of rules we obey. Over
CNY i went to pay respects to my long dead ancestors (my parents are non
christians) and so many people went to temple to pray to long dead ancestors. And i am wondering, what do the dead care? They are dead They no longer worry about us, they are dead.
I think the problem with society is that we are rule based and not love/relationship based. because of that, we try our best to weasel out of doing things. E.g. reunion dinners are now held at restaurant, because we lost the meaning of it. Even those who have it at home are no longer doing it because of the true meaning but because we want to 'keep' traditions. There is no point in doing such things.
The whole purpose of reunion dinners is for family to get together. The new purpose, whether held at home or at a restaurant is simply for us to keep traditions. They re good, i give you that, but the read purpose behind it has been lost. Today, we are a
Chinese generation keeping traditions because we are taught to. There is no love. We do so unwillingly.
Rules are but a tutor to love. Christianity is about rules, you are right, the ten commandments and the 600+ rules in
Leviticus and
Deuteronomy. But underlying it, is the love of God. The reason we keep the rules, is the love of God. When Grace came into the picture, the whole thing changed because we were then able to see that the law was used as a tutor, so that we would know roughly what loving God meant, but we do not serve the law.
Today, we serve the law. Who do you serve? God, or his laws?
I serve God. Because i love him, and i choose his ways.
Labels: Listening, Rules
